I went to meet myself in another world,

in a time where magic unfurled..

The course of events took an unnatural swerve,

the nature of which was filled with verve..

I was a part of me and yet transcendent,

attached yet independent..

Flowing through me, a crimson tide,

to the tune of a drumbeat inside..

Forests within,

darken the given..

Afraid of the shadowy distance to cover,

I try to calm my insides till its over..

But the road is long and muddy,

right about now I need a buddy..

In the face of fear I stand,

silently falling apart in a way I cannot understand..

Crumbled to the floor, I lose myself to the reign of darkness,

the lights are all out, its a truth in all its starkness.

The only sound is the thunderous beating of my heart,

against the painful silence of a new start..

Brought together by a glimmer of hope,

for me to be myself again, there is some scope..

And slowly I am joined crease by crease,

by an absent force making my sense of self increase.

Taking over is a sense of vengeance,

with a fuming flagrance..

To rise and be strong,

a process that wont take too long..

Forming an exterior of cold steel,

is somehow the best way to feel..

Off I go fighting with a drive aglow,

the wounds will show..

When I travel from where I am, to where I belong

I cant be waiting for opportunities to come along.

I am the opportunity,

no slave to importunity.

I must be where I can be me,

not where I crumble like the earth below me..

With each stride, I lose the land I once tread,

with every step I lose some more dread..

In this transient phase, caught in a vortex,

nothing to comprehend, its all too complex..

I'm losing memory of where I was, no time to pause,

and to go back to them is a lost cause..

Traveling back or forth, I cannot tell,

a feeling of anticipation I quell..

Moving on there's a light in the end,

along the slope i begin to descend..

Increasing familiarity,

confusing peculiarity..

A figure standing in the distance,

fear becoming a persistence.

It face I know, all to well,

it shares the same story I tell.

Word to word, there is no change,

it is not strange.

It is essentially who i wanted it to be,

I have finally met me.

It was a cold winter evening, bare trees stood shamelessly as the wind blew, watching folks play delightfully with snowballs, and snowmen alike, slipping, tripping, ice skating over frozen lakes and ponds. The wind resonated with sounds of laughter and merriment, not very far away sat a slightly tense Tyson, today was his big day.

He knew he was going to do it, "no more holding back" he thought as he waited, rather paced to and fro, around that small wooden bench. Not very far away from the public view, yet had an amazing sense of privacy around it. Maybe that's why Alexis and Tyson loved this place, it was like a home away from home. they'd study, talk, laugh, cry, go crazy, and quite literally grow up around this place.

It was "their place".

Many were surprised at how these two 18 year olds could spend hours just sitting there, either engaged in an animated conversation, or enjoying the muted silence which lingered on between them. Tyson and Alexis had liked each other ever since they understood what they word meant. The feelings had always been pretty strong, but both rationalized it under the name of friendship. He could never forget how she laughed every time he did something stupid, or even the times when she fell and laughed at her own clumsiness.. never forget the twinkle in her eyes when he gave her a hand made bracelet for her 16th birthday, and how it never left her wrist ever since the minute he tied it there. She on the other hand never got past his beautiful green eyes, his chiseled jawline, the way he gesticulated when he was particularly enthused about something, the warmth of his reassuring hugs when she leaned on him for support, his scent, the strength of his character, his tender care.. they both loved each other, and never acknowledged it.

Tyson was struggling for the perfect words since the past 3 years, and yet nothing he could come up with would ever be close to perfect.

She finally arrived after what seemed like an eternity (which was actually only 15 minutes..!) there he was, dressed casually, and yet something about him was particularly attractive and it made her weak in her knees.

A little away from the bench was the shack they'd built together, it was their own little "lake house" as they called it. Both their parents knew where exactly to find the kids if they weren't home or at each others place. Only this time, Alexis' parents were out of town, and Tyson had his aunt come over.. perfect excuse to stay out of home. The minute he set his eyes upon her, he was never able to get them off.. she was her usual tomboyish self and yet exuded so much of feminine grace and beauty, that a combination like that was rather hard to let go of.

From a distance, she could see, the shack was lit up with small dim lights, was made very cozy, now especially during the winter, it was a must; to not have to do it herself, made her feel both relieved and slightly worried, she could only wonder what he was up to. Just as she was about to enter, he told her to close her eyes, and then slowly opened the door. She walked into something that looked like it came right out of one of those romantic beautiful-and-rich-princess-meets-handsome-and-brave-prince type of fairy tales.

There he was, down on one knee, with a ring in one hand and her hand in the other, he finally proposed, his words were simple yet messed up, just like his feelings for her and yet nothing could've seemed more perfect.

I may not be able to understand some things sometimes,

But I will always listen,

I may never be good with words,

Yet I will never tire of talking to you,

I may not know how many stars are in the sky,

But know how to put them in your eyes,

I may not be able to bring you the moon,

Because you shine brighter than it,

I may not know how many grains of sand there are,

Yet I know you wont make me count.

I don't know a thousand and ten things about life and society and how to deal with a girl when she's feeling blue..

But I guess I'll find a teacher and companion in you.

Today I ask you to be mine,

'Cause I know that together we'll be so fine!

MARRY ME ALEXIS.

All she could manage was a smile, as tears came rolling down her pretty cheeks, a very overwhelmed and almost choked "yes" escaped her.

It was snowing, and even in the dimness of the lights, one could tell, that they were both glowing.

The world around me often falls apart,
it simply fails to impart -

Any sense of glory and aplomb,
At best, it remains a ticking bomb.
One which I fear will blow me to bits,
Fragmented to frame a truth without benefits.

The world around me often falls apart,
Always at the tip of a dart.

It is in ruins that I find myself,
Depraved of a singular notion of the "self"
In the ruins of the past,
I see the foundation bicker, at last.
I learn a humble lesson or two,
On errors defined falsely as "too few"

The world around me often falls apart,
Devastatingly aiming for a brand new start.

I yearn for the experience of a world yet to be born,
While living along the frayed edges of a paper - torn.
I have seen myself through many faces,
My mind has traversed to a thousand places.
I bare yet, the same set of eyes,
My visions change, reality seldom complies.
Interrupted by chattering, from a dream like trance,
Cretins yammering on of a priestly stance.

The world around me often falls apart,
Imploring me to finally depart.

She spent hours trying to look effortlessly well put together with the right kind of a carelessly messy bun,
He spent hours trying to get the perfect tan, toiling away under the harsh summer sun.

Time slowly watched and smiled, at a leisurely pace it went by,
Letting them gaze into each others eyes, and plainly let out a sigh.
Typical as it may seem,
But that's the content of many a dream.

They wasted time trying to impress each other,
They had no idea what it meant to the significant other -
They arrived together, gazed into each others eyes,
Across tables, their lives intersected over words from the "wise"
They could never focus on anything outside of their fuzzy feeling,
Even when the people they came with, admired the proposal rings.

That day, they were proclaimed man and wife.
Wedded to other people for life.

Photo Credit : www.thinkstockphotos.ca

How do you do it?
Behave like nothing matters, it doesn't to you maybe,
but it does to me, or what's left of me.

I've loved you with all I knew of myself,
and now I'm faced with a stranger in the mirror,
I don't know where she went, the girl who identified with my concept of the self,
She was a warrior.

Now I'm here like a ruined battle ground,
Frayed all over, nothing left to be lost and found.

I've almost forgotten how to breathe,

Anger no longer makes me seethe.

Bruised and broken,
There's nothing left to be spoken.
I reach out, and you don't.
It's not that you can't, but that you won't.

Pragmatically, I get you, your reasons and all.
Emotionally, I fell for all of you, in the season of fall.
Because even though I get why you're like this,
I just wish it wouldn't have to be like this.

So tell me, Love, how do you do it?
Fall in love and then get over it.
How do you breathe with a punctured heart?
Or was it absent right from the start?

Jessica and Melanie, two twin sisters, met at a coffee house, after 16 long years, which followed a separation and fallout between parents after their biological mother died when they were very young. Their father sent Melanie to the care of their relatives. He was far too busy leading a life of luxury with the “other woman” and his “favorite daughter” thought Melanie. But what she didn’t know was the kind of hell Jessica went through everyday. They were both told that the other didn’t want to keep in touch and thus there would be no letters. Their bond was although well established, but it changed with changing times. Where Melanie, was allowed everything that she wanted, Jessica grew to become a subdued although rebellious teenager, where as Melanie blossomed into a self assured individual, sure of what she wanted and where to draw the line.

At 18 they both sat face to face. But it wasn’t like two sisters meeting each other after 14 long years, it was more like a mirror, and the person was so much more different from her reflection. They both had their own set of apprehensions, their own set of grudges, and both of them waited for the other to speak first. None of them spoke, and both went their own way.

One morning of their 20th birthday, both Melanie and Jessica received an email. Melanie, from her father, and Jessica from her aunt who took care of Melanie.

The email read :

Dear Melanie,

I know you must be very mad at me, but there is something you need to know. Your sister and I love and miss you a lot. I’m sure you have your own set of reasons to believe otherwise, but I did try. Try to win both my daughters. You both were 4 when it all happened. 

Before mom left us, I was out on a business trip, with my assistant Kate. When I got a call from my mom’s lawyer, stating that she’d filed a divorce. Mom and I had our share of issues, but we always knew how to get our way around them. But it was this time that your aunt Martha, yes the same one who died three days after mom, she really crossed the line. 

She’d never approved of your mom and me getting married, and did for a major part of the time create a lot of fights between us.You must have heard a very different version from Melissa, but she never really lived with us to sense the gravity of the situation.Melissa and your mom were the best of friends. Mom told Melissa everything, which enraged me to a great extent then, but in retrospect, it seems like a good move. 

When I got back from the trip, I realized that your mom was terminally ill, she told me she’d prepared a will and that I should read it only when she was gone. So the day she left us, I opened that envelope and picked up those printed papers, they read that, both of my daughters would be under the care of Melissa. And that if I wanted custody, I would have to apply for it.. which I did, but I could really only get only one of you, and I couldn’t decide who, for both of you were a beautiful amalgamation of your mother and me, more like your mom though, and I realized how much more I missed her with every passing second after our separation. The court ordered to give me custody of the older of the two, which is how Jessica came to live with me. I would never choose between my two lovely daughters.

Your mother was truly beautiful and so are her two little girls. Your aunt Martha told your mom that I was having an affair with my assistant, which was a lie, because I was never unfaithful.

I write to you to ask of your help. Your sister is falling apart, and it was time you knew the entire truth about your family. I never did cheat on your mother. And I don’t love this woman I’m married to. One might think I had it easy, lost his wife, got married again, still has the money. Only I know the kind of anguish I go through every single moment, living in the same room as the one who killed my wife and forced my children away from me. 

She does terrible things to Jessica as well. 

A sense of closure is something you both yearn for, and I think that if the two of you met, it’d do you both a lot of good. 

On your 20th birthday, I can only give you my love and ask for a lot more in return. I can only hope that you will give your sister a chance and agree to meet her.

Love,

Dad.

Melanie, did. After reading a similar mail, Jessica waited outside a coffee shop in the rain, wondering if Melanie would still be the same. When she saw the same pretty girl walk towards her, she smiled, without even realizing it. They both wanted to hug the other and never let go, but somehow exercised a great amount of restrain. Both stood uncomfortably before, by a sudden sound and jerk were thrown into each others arms. Their hands suddenly felt wet and their stomachs really hurt, looking around them, they saw people were falling, somewhere there was the sound of a fast bike screeching down the lane, and the voices of loud roaring and mean laughter filled the air.

 Mass Shooting.

Their hearts were full, and their eyes welled up. The rain kept washing the blood as it came, but it couldn't wash away the brutality of life. It couldn't wash away the pain. The floor they fell upon was hard and wet, and yet they found comfort in each others arms. The only words that escaped them were, "I've missed you so much" and with that the rain washed away every drop of life within them.

It continued to rain heavily after that, but it was never enough to pour life back into their dead corpses.

It was a dimly lit, dusky saffron sky, the sun was in its last few stages of setting, and with each passing moment as the breeze gently blew, dried leaves fell to the ground, birds chirped their way back to their little nests, children ran around crushing the dry leaves; a happy time for everyone around. The sweet wind carried with it, the fragrance of blossomed flowers, it resonated with the sounds of nature, she sat there quietly smiling, watching her life unfold before her eyes, slowly yet fast, blurred yet distinctly clear in her reflection, her shaky wet reflection which smiled back at her from the white marble base of the water fountain on circumference of which she sat.

Soon she saw the face of the one she waited for, her wait had come to an end.

A new life, a new beginning was in store for her, for when all of nature was slowly preparing to sleep and rest, within her heart was fire and zest. Sure enough she knew about her cheating husband, and no she wasn't plotting his death or anything even remotely close to that. They'd never been separated officially, but they were living apart for almost a year now. Both quite comfortable with the arrangement in some ways, and yet they were dying to be together, just like old times. He was too guilty to face her, and she was too hurt to let it all just go by.

So they both took their time to let it all sink in. He told her it was a mistake, and she believed him, only after 12 long months of separation. Everything about the world was preparing to go to sleep, coming towards the end of a long day's work, only that her time had just begun. On a dusky Autumn sunset, she decided that she needed her husband more than she needed her pride to be intact. Sitting aimlessly, looking undecided in the waters, she made her decision.

When the birds were asleep and so were the children, among all other things alive, she lay awake in an over-sized gown, planning her next day.

It was a little cold outside, but she could feel only the warmth within her heart.